Former NRL star Matt Cooper has revealed hes been fighting a battle against an addiction to painkillers since retiring from St George Illawarra in 2011.Cooper, who played 243 matches for the Dragons in addition to representing NSW and Australia, checked into a private hospital last month to beat a year-long struggle with Endone.The 37-year-old told News Corp he feared he would die in his sleep and broke down sobbing while holding his daughters hand as he came to grips with his problem.It was a cocktail of prescription meds, painkillers, said Cooper.I was like, Im taking too many pills here. There were times there I was like, Im not going to wake up.I Googled how people die from this drug and they just stop breathing. That is when I realised I had to tell my wife. You can only hold a secret for so long and I was just getting tired.The night before I went in, I was sitting on the floor of my daughters bedroom holding her hand for an hour just crying because I thought tonight is the night I am not going to wake up.Coopers addiction to painkillers started about a year ago after helping his father-in-law work with a jackhammer, triggering an old neck injury.Surgery was going to be too risky of being paralysed. Ive seen some guys get operations where they come out and they cant even move their arm and it was a simple operation, he said.For 10 months I didnt do any training because I couldnt as my neck was too sore. I was sitting watching TV and pretty much not doing too much because I was in too much pain.It was a downward spiral from there.My doctor said I am lucky to be alive because of how much I was taking. You start with it and then your body gets used to it so you need to double it and it gets used to it again and you double that.I got to the point where it wasnt working. My doctor was blown away. Blue Jays Jerseys 2019 . Thats about all he can do right now, so hes trying not to think about when he might be able to play again for the Los Angeles Lakers. Toronto Blue Jays Shirts . Once again Jordan Cieciwa (@FitCityJordan) and I (@LynchOnSports) go head to head in our picks. Last weekend at UFC Fight Night 32 my #TeamLynch got the best of #TeamJC by a score of 9-6. Let us know which side youre on for UFC 167 use the hashtag #TeamLynch or #TeamJC on Twitter. https://www.cheapbluejays.com/ . PETERSBURG, Fla. Toronto Blue Jays Gear . Malkin got tangled up with Detroits Luke Glendening early in the third period and his left skate took the brunt of collision with the boards behind Pittsburghs net. Toronto Blue Jays Store . -- Charlie Graham stopped 67 shots as the Belleville Bulls edged the visiting Guelph Storm 6-5 on Saturday in Ontario Hockey League action. WASHINGTON -- Alec Ashers first tour with the Philadelphia Phillies went very badly.This time around hes off to a great start.Ryan Howard hit a three-run homer, Asher pitched six innings of two-hit ball coming off a suspension, and the Phillies defeated the Washington Nationals 4-1 on Thursday night.Asher, acquired from the Rangers in the trade for Cole Hamels, ended last season in the Phillies starting rotation and went 0-6 with a 9.31 ERA in seven starts.Its a testament to his makeup, manager Pete Mackanin said of Ashers improvement. Last year he looked like he was a little nervous most of the time and got rocked around. It was good to see him confident.The right-hander pitched to contact, walking one batter without a strikeout, and throwing 75 pitches in earning his first major league victory.I felt like I wasnt myself at the end of last year and I kind of let the moment get to me, Asher said. I just said Im going to go out there and have fun. Im going to pitch to my strengths.Asher (1-0) was suspended for 80 games while on the disabled list with Triple-A Lehigh Valley in June after a positive drug test. He made four minor league appearances beginning in late August and his suspension ended Sept. 4.Everythings in the past now, Asher said. Its unfortunate what happened. Theres nothing I can do but come up here and pitch now. Happy to be back and looking to stay.Peter Bourjos homered for the Phillies, who snapped a nine-game losing streak against the Nationals.Trailing 4-0, Washington loaded bases with one out in the eighth inning. Daniel Murphy hit a sacrifice fly to the warning track and Bryce Harper struck out.Jeanmar Gomez pitched the ninth for his 36th save.The Nationals received hopeful news regarding Stephen Strasburg, who left his start in the third inning Wednesday night after feeling a pinch in the back of his elbow.Strasburg has a strained flexor mass in his elbow and the Nationals dont know when he will pitch again, but manager Dusty Baker and director of athletic training Paul Lessard voiced optimism after an MRI revealed no ligament damage.A.J. Cole (1-2), one of the pitchers the Nationals may rely on in Strasburgs absence, allowed four runs and five hits in five innings. He struck out eight batters wwithout a walk.ddddddddddddIve always believed in myself as being a big league pitcher, Cole said, and Ive got to be able to show that, and thats what Im doing right now.Bourjos led off the third with a blast off the left field foul pole and, with two outs, Howard lifted a fly ball that carried over the fence in center. It was his 21st homer and career No. 378, tying him with former Nationals manager Matt Williams for 72nd on the all-time list.He just made a couple of pitches that he wished he had back tonight, Baker said of Cole. He seems kind of unfazed by the challenges of the big leagues.THREES COMPANYAsher joins Jerad Eickhoff and Jake Thompson -- who were also part of the Hamels trade -- in the starting rotation. Its kind of cool to see ... guys we got in the trade all in the rotation, Mackanin said. Its going to be fun to watch, I hope.DOUBLE DOINGSMurphy picked up his 40th double of the season, matching his career high. Hes the first second baseman in Nationals history (2005-present) to post a 40-double season.TRAINERS ROOMPhillies: 3B Mikail Franco (sore right thumb) was out of the lineup for the second straight game. Im not going to play him today just because its a little sore, Mackanin said. Theres a little bruising there.Nationals: Normally (these injuries) come around very well with treatment and strengthening programs, Lessard said of Strasburgs elbow. Its not a season-ending injury, but we still need to take time (so) that hes nice and strong because of his past.... Baker said RHP Joe Ross (right shoulder inflammation) is progressing well and the team is trying to determine where hell pitch next with few minor league games remaining.UP NEXTPhillies: Thompson (1-5, 6.48) makes his seventh career start and second against the Nationals. The right-hander allowed two runs and seven hits in seven innings of a 4-0 loss to Washington on Aug. 29.Nationals: RHP Tanner Roark (14-8, 2.89) looks to continue his recent mastery of the Phillies. Hes 3-0 with a 0.64 ERA versus Philadelphia this season. His career mark against them is 5-5 with a 3.81 ERA in 11 games, including nine starts. ' ' '